Sacred Sexuality: A Guide to Transcendental Pleasures

Updated on:
May 30, 2021
Aimee Hughes

Sexuality is at the core of every human being. It plays an important role in our overall vitality and human experience. At its most basic level, it can be a simple release of energy. Or it can be a gateway to reaching the Divine and merging the mind-body-spirit connection. Let’s look at Tantra techniques which teach how sacred sexuality can help us reach higher states of consciousness. 

Sacred sexuality is not a new-age thing, it holds its roots in many ancient civilizations. Often associated with Tantra, sacred sexuality was used to expand one’s spiritual awareness. 

Whilst most religions view sexuality as a human flaw and see it as a distraction from the spiritual path, Tantra actually integrates sexuality as a part of the divine spiritual practice.

sacred sexuality

What Is so Sacred About It?

Sacred sexuality is the term given to extraordinary sex which holds a uniquely spiritual effect. When you engage in sacred sexuality, you tap into a pleasure far greater than that of the primitive ego/personality gratification. You access transcendental bliss

In Tantra, sex is recognized as a universal force and the act is perceived as a sacred ceremony intended to transform its participants. It is a spiritually sexual experience between the two divine polar aspects: the male (Shiva) and the female (Shakti). 1. 

Do You Need a Partner in Order to Awaken Your Sacred Sexuality?

At its core, sacred sexuality is a journey of personal growth often shared with another. It is said that the deepest work is done in partnerships, for it is through the other that we see the self. In a sacred union partners hold up a mirror for one another. 

A good match, then, helps one go beyond the layers of concealment and find personal healing and self-love. This sparks an evolution into something closer to the authentic Self. 

Whilst it is commonly experienced with a partner, sacred sexuality is accessible to everyone – not only those who are partnered up.

Ordinary Sex vs. Sacred Sex

Sex can be a mere release of emotions, a discharge of energy, making it an act of low vibration. Something that we turn to in order to take us away from our suffering – a brief moment of escapism from oneself. This is the sex most people engage in. 

Or it can be a sacred act of nurturing, transforming and rebirth. A way to reach a higher frequency that is closer to the Divine. It is not about running away from anything, but rather toward. It is not about male vs female, but rather two equal forces uniting as one

In other words, sacred sex takes the physicality of intimacy to a higher level where mind-spirit-body connection within yourself and your partner is more profound. You no longer relate to one another as your personas but rather as channels of the Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine presence. 

Sacred Sexuality in the 21st Century 

Sex has become entirely about the physical form and externally focused

Whilst this usually results in orgasm, the orgasm is purely a physical and short-lived phenomena designed to take one away from the present moment. The disconnect between the lovers is ever so present, with people often walking away feeling empty and searching for another hit. 

Sacred sexuality goes far beyond the physical form and its purpose is to connect one to the present moment through prolonged orgasm

There’s Another Kind of Orgasm 

The common orgasm is one that occurs in the genital region. It is short-lived and leaves the body depleted after the expulsion of vaginal fluids or semen. 

The sacred orgasm occurs in the entire body and is long-lasting. As the orgasm occurs throughout the entire body and in the higher chakra systems, oftentimes no ejaculation needs to occur. The release isn’t merely a physical one in the genitals, but rather a non-tangible one coming from the higher chakras. 2.

Science is finally backing sacred sexuality. Adam Safron, neuroscientist at Northwestern University, says that intense rhythmical sexual stimulation can launch one into an altered state of consciousness.

The Taoists believed that men should only ejaculate for the purpose of having children, and otherwise preserve their sexual life force. Whilst women were strongly encouraged to experience sexual fulfillment in order to cultivate prime health. 3.

How Are Sexuality and Spirituality Connected?

To create life is a miracle. Of course, in order to create human life, we must engage in sex. Our spirit comes into being out of sex. Both sex and spirituality are a creative force, and are therefore connected. 

For centuries, spiritual teachers have referred to the force of gravity as yet another sexual attraction. Just as sexual energy is based on a mutual attraction, so is gravity. 4. 

As Deborah Anapol, author of Polyamory in the 21st Century, said: “When we bless, purify, or honor the body as part of a sexual encounter, when we bond more deeply as a result of lovemaking, or when sexual union catapults us into higher consciousness, we make sex sacred.”

The Ultimate Guide to Tapping into Your Sacred Sexuality

1. Honor your body.

See your body as a temple of Spirit and your sexuality as a part of that temple. Rather than deny or vilify your sexuality, free yourself from such limitations and embrace your body as whole. 

A good way to cultivate this is with positive affirmations and mantras. Practice feeling more and seeing less. So rather than see the physicality of your body (your age, gender, race, wrinkles, shape, height etc.) tune in to the energy that you feel within your body. 

2. Connect with your sexual organs. 

Embrace your yoni/lingam and drop all shameful notions you may have of your genitals.

The most effective way to connect with your pelvic region is to engage in a yoni or lingam self-massage. Alternatively, going into a healing meditation will prove just as profound. 

Sitting in a comfortable seated position, close your eyes and take a moment to empty your mind and become aware of your breath. Place your hands over your sexual organs and imagine the area filling with the color pink. Breathe into your sexual organs and feel the love and compassion flowing into your genital region. Now imagine the energy emitting from your sex organs travels up to your stomach, heart and brain. Let your entire body be charged with this blissful sexual life force. 

3. Merge the feminine and masculine.

Regardless of your gender, you carry the essence of both feminine and masculine within you. Embracing your yin (feminine) and yang (masculine) energies will make you complete and stop you from looking externally for that fulfillment

Practices such as Nadi Shodana are ideal for harmonizing the masculine and feminine. 

4. Open up your heart chakra.

Sex is all about the physical self ascending (evolution) and the spiritual self descending (involution). The two energies meet in the middle, which happens to be the heart center, creating a powerful space of pure bliss.

The power of your sexuality resides not only in your genitals but also in your heart center. Once you merge your heart energy with your sex energy, you will create a safe space that will cultivate a greater sensual and intimate experience

Heart and sacral chakra-led meditations or asana would work well in opening up any blockages you may have in these energy centers. 

5. Cultivate heightened intimacy 

Connect with your partner by utilizing the below tantric methods: 

  • Soul-gazing (looking into each other’s eyes without verbal communication)
  • Synchronizing your breaths
  • Conscious slow touching
  • Body mapping (exploring their entire body as if you were mapping it)
  • Mirroring each other’s movements
  • Hand to heart (touch is said to increase oxytocin, see image below) 5.
  • Heart to heart (embracing one another with your heart centers lined up and touching).
  • Practice orgasmic meditation

6. Just let go

Letting go of all preconceived knowledge and control is the key for the surge of energy to occur. And whilst there has to be some control, as it is a very specific “ritual” with control of movement and breath, there is ultimately no self-control.

It is, perhaps, one of the greatest ironies of life. It is when one truly accepts their fear of letting go, that one finds the key to control.

Transcendental meditation, pranayama, and kundalini practices are powerful tools in aiding one in letting go. 

It’s Time to Start Expecting More from Our Sex

The time has come for humanity to turn to ancient wisdom and celebrate life rather than death. We are not born out of sin, we are born out of a magnificently powerful force called sexuality. And if we all practiced sacred sex perhaps a profound transformation would take place with the human experience being more blissful than it presently is.

Sex allows us to transcend beyond ourselves like no other experience does. We already hold the key within us, all we need now is to invest our time and energy into practicing sacred sexuality. 

Perhaps if we did, the internal alchemy would make us realise that there is no greater union on this planet

Aimee is a mindfulness enthusiast who's practiced yoga for 21 years. She earned her B.A. in French from Tulane University and a Doctorate in Naturopathy from Clayton College.
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